Friday, October 28, 2016

Self Compassion

Capture Your Grief - Day 28 - Self Compassion

"Self Compassion is integral to healing your broken heart. You can start to practice more self compassion by showing yourself a little more love and care. Do you have any self-care practices? What are your thoughts on taking care of yourself."

This is another hard one.  The truth of the matter is that I probably should take out some time on a consistent basis, to get out of the house without the kid.  The year we lived in Gainesville, the biggest life saver in the insanity that was no job, a toddler, a new born, and Gary's insane school schedule - was that every two or three weeks, I took a book and went to Chickfila.  Sometimes I got lunch, sometimes I just came up there and sat there and drank water.  I just had to get out of the house.  I'd go in the afternoon after Gary was done with classes, in between lunch and supper rush, so that I wouldn't be a bother to sit there for up to an hour.

I need to take more time to myself.  I wake up to someone climbing on me asking for food most mornings, we clean, we do school, sometimes we have a little down time right before time to start supper and Gary to come home.  Then it's like pulling hair to get kids to eat, get them to bed.  It's exhausting, and too many days in a row with no break leaves me frazzled and short tempered.  There were times early on, I will confess that I resented the kids always being there.  I had no ability to just grieve and cry in the bed all day.  People still wanted to eat, three times a day.  Oh my goodness!  Why is everyone always hungry?

I try to snag a few minutes here and there, mostly after bedtime to color and de-stress, or journal, or do some weekly planning in my planner.  But it's an area that really needs some improvement.  And I think aside from the benefits to my patience level, it's would be good for the kids to know that everything in my world DOES NOT revolve around them.  I think sometimes, they don't get that reality check, and it's not good for their attitudes.

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