The Joy of My Salvation: November 2011

Dani - This weekend five years ago, I met my ever so wonderful love of my life. He drove the 750 plus miles from South Florida and showed up at Wendy's where I was working at the time. I didn't know what to expect, after all I had only meet him online. To top it off, he only had 2 pictures up online and both were taken 50 feet away of him, a sister, a cousin, and a friend in the Bahama's all wearing glasses. I will confess I was wondering what I had gotten myself into. After all, I could have meet a crazy ax murderer online. So as we prearranged, he walked up to my register and ordered 200 chicken nuggets. I knew instantly it was him and took my break.

Gary - I spent the entire ride, the entire long nine hours telling myself, "Are you crazy? You told her you were coming, you can't turn around and go home now!" I arrived, and it took me 30 mins to clean up, buy her favorite flowers, and drove around to make sure that she wasn't working the drive through. I finally got up the courage to actually walk into the store, and then I ordered 200 chicken nuggets. Don't you know it, I got no free chicken nuggets and I only got to spend 8 minutes with her before heading to her house to spend 8 hours with her family. At 2:30 in the morning, someone finally showed up. She said, hang on a few minutes and she went to take a 25 minute shower where I could here her singing church songs. And as the great story teller Forest Gump would say and "And that's all I got to say about that story."

Dani - We visited over my supper break and the 30 minutes passed far too quickly. I can remember walking back into the kitchen and telling one of the girls that I worked with that he was it. I just knew it. I called home and told him that he was on his way. And like my father before me, I told them if they ran him off before I got home that I would kill them all. When I made it home that night around 2:30am, I had to hop in the shower after all I couldn't go in there to talk to him in a tacky Wendy's uniform smelling like chicken nuggets and hamburgers. We spent Saturday talking, visiting, playing games, and reluctantly called it a weekend on Sunday evening. The best part of the weekend was the ride with Gary back to Atlanta and we talked about a little bit of everything. Our dreams and fears, dark moments, and funny things. We were so busy talking that Daddy called to remind us to find a restaurant for supper, and we had already passed all the good places. We said good-bye after a quick supper at Long John Silver's, and Gary continued back to Florida, and Daddy and I headed to South Carolina to visit grad schools. I was on cloud nine.

Gary - So, I find out that Danielle and her dad are going to some loser school on Monday, and that they will be traveling in the same direction that I will travel. So, Danielle and I were able to ride together all the way to Atlanta, Georgia. I had already passed my turn off onto I-75, and we stopped at the classy Long John Silver's. About 30 seconds later her daddy pulled in and he paid for her supper and she never kissed me. She went North and I went South. And less than a month later, I bought her a ring.

8:41 PM 3 random thoughts

Brother Sonny, recently posted on Facebook about the concept of Un-Thanksgiving from a daily devotional. It suggested that you make a list of things you are not thankful for. He wrote, "As I meditated on this principle the following thoughts occured to me. My Thanksgiving (Blessings) list is alot longer than my Un-Thanksgiving list. Also For everything on My Un-thanksgiving list there are many things related that I am Thankful for. As an example at the top of my Un-Thanksgiving List I have. I am Un-Thankful for Cancer: But I am Thankful for a God that Heals. I am thankful for God giving us Dr. Dupont and her great staff for taking such good care of my dearest precious wife which by the way God blessed me with and who I am also Thankful for. And I am Thankful for such wonderful caring and supporting children. And I am Thankful for our caring and supporting Brothers and Sisters in the church. etc.etc. I think this is a good exercise in seeing that we have more things to be thankful for than things to be Un-thankful for." Well, that got me thinking.

Then on the way up to Alabama last weekend, I was reading the sixth Mitford novel by Jan Karon (great books by the way), and the pastor in the books, had gone through a hard spell with a diabetic coma, an accident that seriously injured a pedestrian, and a general sense of despair and depression. Near the end of the book while studying for a sermon, at the 12th hour, so to speak, he found the Lord giving him his topic, I Thessalonians 5:18 "In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you." His point in his following sermon, was that this verse doesn't say give thanks when everything is going great, or give thanks when you are on the mountain top, but give thanks in everything. Well that got me thinking a bit more.

Then this week, Gary and I listened to the messages from some of the brethren at Little Union last Sunday. Since the Church was unable to find a minister to fill in last Sunday some of the brothers in the Church gave testimony of what great things the Lord has done for them, and told of things that the Lord had laid on their heart. Bro. Jamie posted the messages to the Churchwebsite, and then Bro. Matt wrote a little more about his thoughts. And well, that got me thinking some more.

I choose on our blog to only record the happenings, to give little happy snippets into our life. I don't use this as a place to gripe and complain, or to moan and cry. I don't think it edifies anyone, it doesn't make for good reading, I'm not trying to get sympathy, and frankly I don't know that I like those inner feelings out on the internet for any and everyone to read. Some people are great at balancing the trials and joys of everyday life with amazing grace and a touch of humor (I can think of a few blogs I stalk that fit that description), but I'm not sure that I'm able to do that. So sometimes when I can't find something interesting to report or can't stop a little whiny voice in my writing, I'm absent a little while.

These thoughts got me thinking though. Sometimes we should be real with one another and real look at ourselves, our lives, our attitudes and evaluate what we see. I will confess that I can make a very long un-thankful list. To top it off would be the startling, and frightening revelation...

We have been without work, gainful employment, a real job, a career for my husband for over two years now.

Believe me, I am a control freak, an organizer, a planner of things, I like to know what is coming and in great detail to prepare for it. I do not like uncertainty, out of the routine, or flying by the seat of my pants. (I even envy a little those who can seem to so easy roll with the punches and handle whatever happens along, making major course changes with no stress, map, stars, or other visible guiding factors). I cannot tell you how many times Gary and I have said, if we just knew the date and the job that we would have next, this would be so much easier.

HOWEVER, even in this great trial there have been so very many blessings. Gary has often said what a joy it is to spend this much time with the kids, most working parents miss so much of a child's life in the day to day happenings, not big things necessarily, just the every day things. And while Gary might enjoy missing the finger painting on the walls with dirty diapers, the truth is that he has had the remarkable joy of spending 24 hours a day with our children. Britt was 8 months old when Gary lost his job. What a blessing to spend that much time together the four of us as a family. What a blessing I have had to have him at home to tag team on diaper changes, feeding children, and handling messes. I get to sit and eat lunch with him each and every day, while the kids take a nap. These little things when you stop and think how rare they are in today's world are a great blessing. After all what may appear to be little and insignificant isn't really. We take for granted often the rising and setting sun, the fact that we wake up each morning, but each day is a gift, a gift from God. What is even more amazing is God's providential care for us in the big things. We have not had any major illnesses or accidents in this time without health insurance. Due to the generosity of the Church and our family, we have never been without food, a home, clothing for the kids, or gas money. In fact, we have had more than our needs met. Every time I start crunching numbers and panicking, Gary finds a part time or temporary position, or we find a letter in the mail box where someone had us on their heart. A truely humbling experience, a great blessing from God when you stop to consider it. Too great to truly grasp perhaps, definitely too great for words.

You know there are many things that Gary and I regularly thank the Lord for at night, our children, good health, "all of Your many rich blessings" is a phrase Gary often uses. But even in times of hardship, even when all looks hopeless, there are things that we can find to be thankful for. Because even when the valley is dark and deep and oh so lonely, even when I stumble and wonder can He hear our prayers, why does nothing get better, there are many blessings even then. He is the Lily of the Valley. He is in the valley and along the way He can be seen if we just look around. Too often I am too busy looking around and wondering when will we have a job, when will life no longer be on hold, when can we have more children, when can we have a house of our own, when this, when that. There is nothing wrong with any of those things, but I find that the problem is that I am too busy focusing on the "when" of non guaranteed future blessings, to enjoy the blessings that we already have right at this very moment. Life isn't on hold, it's happening each day, all around us, each moment.

This Thanksgiving I am thankful for more than the food and the family, not to diminish those, but there is so much more I can be thankful for. I am thankful for the continued providence of God in our lives. I am thankful for the Lord who sees and cares. I am thankful for what may be seemingly small, every day blessings. I am thankful for even the valleys, because how else would we know the blessed glory of the mountain tops without the darkness of the valleys.

7:54 AM No random thoughts

9:35 AM 1 random thoughts

2:34 PM No random thoughts

Today, I put up Mother and Daddy's Christmas tree. Gasp, I know, one of my big pet peeves is Christmas music before the week of Christmas, putting out Christmas items in the store in July, and the way that Thanksgiving as the most wonderful holiday of the year is always getting skipped over. This year we came home for Thanksgiving, and we won't be back to visit with my side of the family again until probably sometime around Mother's spring break in April. It's always our long stretch of the year.

Anyway, we made the collective decision to have Christmas for the kids while we were here. They could have mailed their Christmas presents or sent them back with us for them to open on Christmas day. After all the first Christmas, Gary and I were married they did that. However, they want to enjoy the looks on their faces as they get to open presents. We had Thanksgiving-Christmas with Mother's side of the family last night. Ruth plans to tell all about that on Wednesday so I won't steal her thunder. Tomorrow night we plan to have our little family Christmas here with Mother and Daddy and my three brothers, and I thought we NEEDED to have the tree up to be in the spirit of things. You knew I would make it back around to the whole point of putting up the tree early.

I love the look of a Christmas tree, if I could figure out how to do it I would use those bright, happy, little, white lights all over my house all year long. With all the lights in the house out, and the just the tree lights on it's so peaceful. I love the process of putting the things on the tree. Some people have themed trees, and I'm not knocking that, because they look really, really cool (even though I can't seem to pull them off), but my family has the best eclectic totally random tree of all times. There are ornaments I made in Kindergarten, my brother's Angel of Death, there are the engraved ornaments that Mother got for each of us when we were first born, one that says our first Christmas together 1983 for my parents, there is one that is a basket ball when Nicholas played b'ball, one neat candy cane that Benji made and no one has ever found the stuff to make more, there are the ugly Santas, and all of Daddy's many, many, many Loony Tunes and Disney ornaments. I've mentioned a few of these in older post here and here.

Each of those old ornaments have memories associated with them, but we also get new ones each year. From now on when I see the cow that Daddy picked out this year I will have memories of Britt kissing it over and over all night and straining and saying Moooooooo at the top of his lungs. The way he begged and begged to hang "so more balls pwease, Momma?" After hanging the 3 dozen or so that Mother all ready and and the 3 dozen more she got at Hobby Lobby this year. The way Ruth kept going back to the new MM's ornaments. Or perhaps my new favorite memory from this year will be the way that Britt and Ruth after hanging their two Sesame Street ornaments, brought me all the little Sesame Street toys and asked for hooks for them to add them to the tree. They still needed a little help here and there as Britt but nearly 10 of the orange balls all together, and 8 of the 10 candy canes (which he insists by the way are candy bars) all together, but it was a great time of togetherness.

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(ps - if you are curious about how I took the totally awesome tree pics I must confess that I'm not that talented of a photographer, I found out how by going here.)

9:16 PM No random thoughts

9:34 AM No random thoughts

Ruth,

Today you are 15 months old. Just two weeks ago we had your one year appointment so late it could have been your 15 month appointment. Your daddy couldn't remember the exact measurements, but you are weighing in now at a little over 23 pounds, and you are a short little thing at about 27 inches. You mastered walking in about 2 weeks, and have the funniest little sash-shay. I don't know if it's a girl thing, or just your particular way of walking, but it's adorable. You don't run persay, but you sometimes do pick up speed and have this funny run/skip thing you do. You are still very cautious, you quickly learned to climb backwards down steps, and off the couch or chair that I'm holding you in. You have mastered climbing on to the hearth, where you then stand and walk along it, dancing, and showing off.

You have several words, and seem to understand anything I say to you and ask about. You still say mama, dadada, and baba (for Britt), but you know also say "cup", "biiiiii-biiiiiiiii" (dragging out the ending for bye bye), hey-o (for hello), and ni-ni, (for night-night). You also have several signs that you consistently make for other items. You hold your hands out and open and close them if you want me to come and pick you up, you rub your cheek when you want your satin monkey (that you have developed a huge attachment for), you put the flat of your hand to your mouth to blow kisses and your fingers to your mouth when you are hungry, you wave outward now, and rub your hair when you want a bath. You will go and get your blanket and bring it to me, when you are ready for a nap, or bedtime. You chatter constantly and are very animated, you probably have more words, but Daddy and I often have trouble understanding you due to the high pitch of your little voice.

You more and more show a little temper, but I don't have to spank you very often. We've started having to take you out and spank you during church some, but you never need more than two little pops, and you settle right down. You are typically happy and eager to please. You always cry for Britt when he is taken out of Church. When he comes back in you lean over and pat his shoulder and pet his hair. You are a comforter at heart. I am continually amazed at your big heart and sweet spirit. When we fuss at you, discipline you, or don't let you have something you want you almost never get mad, but you cry like we've broken your little heart.

You are growing so fast, and it has been so much fun to look at different pictures of you. Your first Halloween to this Halloween, your first trip to the beach and your last, watching as you grow and change from picture to picture reminds me just how quickly time passes. Momma and Daddy love you so very much little miss.

Love,

Momma

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1:15 PM No random thoughts

Last Monday, we was Halloween, and after the unfun things like doctor's appointments. We got to go to a pumpkin patch and then trick or treating. Since Momma was sick the whole week before we never went and got a pumpkin this year. However, Momma wanted some pumpkin patch pictures, so we did that before we got all dressed up in our costumes. Britt really liked all the pumpkins. I didn't care for them. Daddy kept trying to get me to hold a little one, but I kept shaking my head and saying "No, tak to" (no, thank you). Britt's favorite part was probably all the scarecrows sitting around holding baskets. He kept carrying all these little pumpkins and putting them in the baskets. I tried to tell him he didn't have to and that the scarecrows weren't real, so it didn't matter, but he didn't listen to me. He never listens to me.

After the pumpkin patch, we got all dressed up in our costumes. Britt was Woody from Toy Story. He wore his Woody pjs and his boots. Momma pulled out a bandana for him to wear and Mister found him a hat that was way too big. Britt seemed really happy with his outfit. I got to be a fairy, but everyone kept thinking I was a butterfly. I don't know why? I mean I had a dress on. We went to see Grandmaw Bea, Memaw and Mister, Uncle Charles and Aunt Yvone, Granddaddy Garland, Aunt June and Uncle Jerry, and finally Aunt Joanna and Uncle Quintin. We had a good time playing at everyone's house. Aunt Joan and Lilli went with us.

I don't think Britt has all of the brain cells that he should have. I mean, I figured out at the first stop what to do. Smile, they hold out candy, I grab as much as possible, say "tak to", and then I try to open and eat it all. Daddy carried this nifty little bag around all night for me to drop my candy in. After I figured out that I would need some help to get the candy out I stashed it all in there, and made him carry it. Britt on the other hand wouldn't say "Trick or Treat" like Lilli, he said, "Pumpkins!" everytime someone openned the door, and then he would yell for Momma and refuse to get any candy. See what I mean? Anyone who doesn't grab as much candy as they can before Daddy steps in to get you out of the bowl is insane!

The only thing I don't understand about this whole process is what happened to all that candy I netted? I've looked all over this house for it since then, and I haven't eaten very much of it, but I can't find it anywhere. Something tells me that Daddy is to blame.

3:35 PM No random thoughts

3:34 PM No random thoughts

A couple of weeks ago, Gary had an interview at a business in Boyton Beach, which is next to West Palm Beach. Just the Sunday evening before we had been talking about the Gold Coast as it is called, and I have never been that far south, so I asked Gary to ride along.

After his interview we drove around. The place was amazing! Gary has always told me that you have to have money to live over there. Alot of folks have had the land for many generations, and as it is the oldest settled area of North America, it has some very old families with alot of money. They have tons of enormous old oaks and towering palm trees, the landscaping was unbelievable. Everything, everywhere we looked as if it had just been trimmed. There were clean lines, elaborate shapes, circle trees, hedges that grew into arches over drive ways. It was all a little unreal. We even saw some trees around a golf course that had to be at least 40 foot tall according to Gary that they had trimmed to look like massive box hedges.

Oh and the houses, wow, I didn't think to take any pictures until we got to the area of town, where you almost couldn't see them except in little glimpses through the landscaping, but I have never seen anything like them in my life. Each one was spralling, they looked like 20 bedroom houses, most had at least 3 floors, and different wings to them. We saw one that had 3 mother-in-law suites, except each of the little outlying homes where twice the size of our house. It was unreal. Each house had such amazing architecture and each one was so very different from their neighbors not cookie cutter at all. Some had Spanish tile roofs, others had your typical shingles, and still others had a different sort of tiling on the roofs. Some looked like classical Georgian homes, others looked like something from an ancient Spanish country estate, there were some

that looked straight out of the Italian Renaissance. The truly amazing part though was the attention to detail in each home. The carving on the eves, the detailed columns, the glass in the

windows. It was something alright. I've seen lots of nice homes, and I've even seen some beautiful historical houses that have been restored, but I've never seen anything like these.

After driving around an hour or so looking at the houses, we found a place where we could walk out on the beach a little ways. The sand was dark, and not as powder fine as what we've seen on the Gulf side, but pretty none the less. As always Gary found me a few pretty shells to put in our vase at home. He always picks me out a few shells each trip we take to the beach. It was incredible windy and the surf was pretty high, but it was nice.

We took a few back roads back to Fl-60 and enjoyed the drive. It was such a nice day to spend together. We don't get many trips without the kids, and it was nice to be able to ride together and talk and just sit together and enjoy the almost magically sound of silence.

8:46 AM No random thoughts

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