|4-3, Kate's big chubby cheeks just like her Daddy.|
Pregnancy sleep is really weird. I've always had strange and vivid dreams. PAL sleep (pregnancy after loss) is even weirder. I can't get a break even at night. In my dreams Kate and Abigail get all mixed up. I dream about Abigail and our loss, or I dream about Kate dying and having to pick out another tombstone. The most common recurring dream, is one where Kate is born, and something isn't right and they wisk her off, before I can even see her. I always wake up before I find out what is wrong or if she's going to be ok.
|4-3, Does she have my Daddy's chin, or is it just the angle?|
Sure enough this past week, she turned down, back up, and down again. At the ultrasound in the OB office yesterday, she was head down. Yesterday for the first time in months, we got to see some of the 3D shots. The kids were really amazed by them. I had fun showing them to Gary yesterday. She looks alot like Ruth did to me. She has big cheeks and Gary's nose. We have debated if she has my dad's chin, a feature he'd rather not pass on. Gary was insistent she was another blond, while I remain convinced that this one will have red-hair.
|I can't see my feet, but apparently the camera can just barely pick them up.|
With Britt I can remember a very clear dream about a month before he was born, of a toddler with blond, blond hair and blue eyes like Gary, he had manic sounding laugh. With Ruth I can remember a dream of black hair, fat chubby feet, and a big smile as she was learning to walk. With Rebecca I dreamed the week before she was born about a blond headed little girl. After losing Abigail I have had two dreams of a red head with long, smooth, stick straight hair, always from the back. I can never see her face. With this baby I have once dreamed off a girl with red, curly hair and blue eyes like Gary's. Not tight Shirley Temple curls like I was always jealous of, but just some gentle curls. The first three have proven to be so much more than I could have dreamed or imagined.
|3-27, Kate's profile.|
We are thinking more and more these days about labor and bringing Kate home. I've cleared out a spot for the crib. We have plans to order replacement hardware next week, and set up the baby bed. I've washed the 0-6 month clothes and put them away in the dresser. Last week we went up to the hospital and did the tour, and talked with a labor and delivery nurse. I finally sat down and wrote up a birth plan, one we plan to talk with the doctor about next week. I've written up the last of our lesson plans, made plans to get the kids evaluated, and then rap up the school year. We've talked about tentative plans for Mother and Daddy to come down. We are optimistically making plans, even while also making worse case plans. I'll spare you those contingencies, but I still find it hard to be certain that we are bringing Kate home, instead of carrying her to Hopewell too.
|Everything ends up on my stomach these days. At 9 am, I|
already have laundry detergent on my shirt.